Yesterday, I repeated my 3 hour glucose test after an "abnormal" result when I took it a couple months ago. Today, I got a phone call from a nurse at Kaiser...they're diagnosing me with Gestational Diabetes.
I'm not even sure I have words at this point to explain how devastated I was when I heard those words. I did, at least, have the clarity to ask for my exact numbers (which were still more "abnormal" than high). The nurse scheduled me for an appointment with the dietician on Friday, and I immediately burst into tears as soon as I hung up the phone.
It's not incredibly surprising that I ended up with GD. I meet many of the "high risk" criteria: I'm seriously overweight, nearing 30, and have a family history of both GD and Type 2 Diabetes. I just assumed that I wouldn't have it since I never had any issues during my pregnancy with BabyA.
Since my numbers weren't outrageous, there's no reason to think I can't control my sugar levels with diet and exercise. However, that requires an amazing amount of work. Work that can only be done by me. I'm already feeling stretched thin by the amount of "keeping up" I have to do around the house, as well as making sure everyone else's lives flow smoothly. Exercise is complicated by the incredibly severe pelvic pain I've been battling during this pregnancy. My OBGYN doesn't seem concerned, but the pain I experience almost every day makes even small daily tasks a real challenge...not to mention attempting to keep up with BabyA while The Husband works 60-70 hours a week and catches up on his sleep during his days off.
Adding to my stress is the fact that I am giving birth at a hospital and with a care provider (Kaiser) that is very intervention-happy. I have a great doula, and I'm confident in my ability to advocate for myself (until I go into actual labor, that is...after that, all bets are off), but I hate the stress. I hate the misinformation and scare tactics that are used to coerce expectant mothers into just doing whatever their OBGYNs suggest. I really hate having to think through every potential minute of pregnancy and birth to make sure that I can have the safest and best birth possible. I hate confrontation.
I've always been the girl who will just smile and nod if it means and end to a confrontation. I can't tell you the number of times I've told The Husband "okay, you're right" because I didn't want to argue. I don't mind educated discussion or disagreement, but these medical professionals can get very defensive if you question their methods.
I've done a lot of research. I purposely chose a doctor who'd been recommended because of his support of natural birth and VBAC (I birthed BabyA naturally, but it seems to me that VBAC-friendly OBGYNs tend to be more supportive of intervention-free birth in general). Unfortunately, I don't have a lot of options for alternative care. So I grimace internally whenever he mentions having a c-section because the baby's "too big," and try to remember that I am not going to get a midwife out of an OBGYN (especially a Kaiser OBGYN).
The GD experience with which I am most familiar is my mom's. I was almost 17 when she gave birth to my youngest sister, and she had diet-controlled GD during her 3rd trimester. She had a c-section because of other health conditions and her doctor's unwillingness to let her attempt a VBAC. My sister was a normal birth weight (7 lbs 9 oz), especially considering my mom's 4 previous pregnancies ended in 8+ lb babies. My mom was also nearing 40 during that birth (she turned 38 a week after my sister was born). I don't remember it being horrible, but I was also working and attending college full time, so I can't say I was really around to observe much.
Today, the nurse told me that she was sure I'd be fine as long as I followed the diet given to me, "unless you're already eating that way." She sounded a little less perky when I told her that I basically had been. After all, growing up in a house with a diabetic (my dad was diagnosed with type II when I was about 10 years old) has to leave a mark. I'm not going to say that I eat like a diabetic all the time. I enjoy bread and pasta more than a couple times a week (especially since pasta is an inexpensive way to feed my family in a time when I have to stretch every dollar), and I don't turn down dessert if it's particularly appealing. I also enjoy a drink at Starbucks every week or two (and I don't order it "skinny"). I do, however, try to eat a lot of protein. I enjoy vegetables, and I have really been craving salads lately. I do occasionally eat an entire pint of Ben and Jerry's, but I'm not sucking down sugar with a straw before I go to bed every night.
Could my exercise level improve? Probably. But I'd really like to see my OBGYN attempt more exercise than chasing around a 16 month old toddler while his pelvic bone feels like it's being broken in several places while someone punches him repeatedly in the vagina. That's the best description I've been able to manage, and it's fairly apt (if a little less painful than what I actually experience on an almost daily basis). I'm sure it has something to do with the amount of Relaxin that my body is producing, since I had a chiropractor make a comment to that effect. Knowing the probably cause, however, does not make me feel any better on a day-to-day basis.
So I'll continue to do my research on evidence-based care for GD, and read lots of boring studies on the potential effects of GD. I want my natural birth, and I'll be damned if I let a stupid number on a glucose meter take that from me.
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